7 Self Care Mistakes: and how to really nurture yourself
As a mom I am constantly running myself ragged. Sometimes it seems like weeks before I have any time to myself. I mean seriously half the time I can’t even go to the bathroom by myself. The need for self care is real. After all it is true that if you can’t take care of yourself you can’t take care of others. But there are 7 Self Care Mistakes that I often make. You probably do too.
Note: I am a mom, so most of my suggestions and self care lens comes from that perspective. I do not mean that only moms need self care. If the past year has taught us anything it is that life is stressful. We all need to be paying attention to our mental health and self care is a huge part of that. Many of these same observations and suggestions apply to everyone.
Feeling Guilty
As I just mentioned you should never feel guilty for wanting to nurture and care for yourself. You cannot care for others if you are not taking care of yourself. So seriously self care needs to be a top priority.
Not Fitting In Your Budget
I would love to have the type of budget where my self care routine could include impromptu trips to Paris or the Caribbean for the weekend but no–not with my budget. If we overspend on our self care routine, then we will just be making more stress for ourselves as we struggle to pay that bill on top of everything else.
Not Fitting Your Lifestyle
I have discovered I absolutely hate having my feet touched. So pedicures are not my thing. Don’t let someone else tell you what should make your feel relaxed or rejuvenated, especially if it doesn’t fit your lifestyle or values.
Not Knowing What Really Nourishes You
Closely related to number 3, figure out what you really love, what really makes you feel nourished. Is it a meal out at a restaurant that you didn’t have to cook? A nap in the middle of the afternoon? A cuddly movie with your husband or partner? Take the time to figure it out and go with it.
Not Doing It (Talking about self care here)
Find the time and make it happen. I know there are days when just eating a full meal can be a struggle, but if you don’t want to crash and burn (you do not I have been there, you probably have too) you need to make it happen.
If Your Plans don’t work out becoming angry
Sometimes it takes more then one try to find the right fit. Life with children often means that emergencies come up (at least in the eyes of your kids). If your plans get disrupted don’t get angry, just plan another time right away and try again. This is way easier said then actually done. Full disclosure this is where I often fail. I wait too long to plan something out, then when it doesn’t happen I have a melt down. So plan early, plan often and be flexible!
Not Doing it Enough (Again Self Care)
Ideally you will have something that you can look forward to every day–a nap, a bath, a quiet cup of tea, your favorite TV program. It probably won’t happen every day, but you should still prioritize it. Try for bigger things at least weekly. Don’t wait until you feel desperate to start thinking about taking care of yourself.
How to really nurture yourself
Make it a daily priority.
Having food you love eating can go a really long way. Not in the chocolate cake every day sense, but good whole foods that really leave you feeling nourished. For me that is bread and soup. For my husband, Proeun, that is anything with rice. Be honest with yourself and when possible take the time to prepare the foods that really feed you.
Get enough sleep. Sometimes it is incredibly difficult, especially if the flu is going through the house. But sleep when the baby sleeps. This advice for new parents goes for older parents too. Nap if you have to. Stay in bed in the morning if you can, don’t feel like you have to get up, if you can sleep, do it.
Have a hobby. Mine is reading. I love reading. That is a an easy one, I try to make sure I read some every day. It takes me away and gives me the opportunity to expand my consciousness. What do you really love and make time to do it?
One amazing resource I found in Deeply Holistic by Pip Waller. It is literally amazing and will make you think of self care in a completely different way. She breaks it down by body systems for example muscular system, nervous system, etc. If it is in your budget get it. It will change your life.
I hope you have some ideas about what to do and what not to do. And start today.
